Two rescue dogs, a black lab mix named Loki and a mystery mix named Arwen
Randy- high school English teacher and author
Kathryn- full time Ph.D. student
Our honeymoon in Palawan, Philippines
Reading, hiking, board games, indoor rock climbing, traveling, watching TV
We’re Kathryn and Randy, a married couple in our mid-30s living in Stanford, California. Thank you for taking the time to learn about us. While we can’t fully understand how difficult this situation must be for you, we fully appreciate the love that drives your decision. We will explain who we are as clearly and honestly as we can here, in hopes that it helps you.
Kathryn is a chemistry teacher turned PhD student in science education, and Randy is a high school English teacher and author of books for teens. We were unable to have children on our own and are excited to start our family through adoption. We have a stable, loving relationship, and we look forward to sharing that unconditional love with a child.
We met on Kathryn’s first day in Camden, New Jersey, where she had moved after college to start teaching high school chemistry, and where Randy had already been teaching for a year. We developed a closeness after having a discussion that lasted through the night, and then couldn’t stop hanging out for the next week. We already knew that we both had a passion for education, but we also ended up bonding over our multiracial identities (Kathryn’s mother is from Puerto Rico and Randy’s father is from the Philippines), our belief that religion is about more than going through the motions, and our desire to help make the world a better place. A few months later we were engaged, and we’ve now been married for 10 years.
We love spending time together and consider each other our best friend. We both enjoy reading, playing board games together or with friends, and getting lost in our favorite sci-fi/fantasy series—all hobbies that we look forward to sharing with our child. We also enjoy simply relaxing while watching TV and cuddling with our dogs. On the active side, we love hiking, backpacking, and indoor rock climbing. We also enjoy seeing the world. Together, we’ve traveled to Italy, the Czech Republic, South Korea, Hong Kong, the Philippines, the Caribbean, Iceland, and the Galapagos Islands. Through this, we’ve learned to appreciate other countries and cultures, and we hope to continue travelling once we are parents, in order to share that appreciation with our child.
Kathryn is one of the most compassionate people I’ve ever known. She cares deeply for her family and friends, maintaining frequent contact despite the distance and years. People love her immediately because she radiates kindness and warmth. When she was a teacher, struggling students gravitated toward her because they knew she was someone who genuinely cared and listened, which I know is how she will make our child feel. She was even awarded Teacher of the Year before we moved from the east coast to the Bay Area a couple years ago!
Kathryn is also fiercely intelligent. But more impressive than any of her academic and professional accomplishments is the fact that she’s driven by a love for learning and for humanity. This motivates her professionally as she seeks to understand how chemistry can be taught in ways that will connect with students and inspire them to create a better world. She’s also fluent in Spanish and has an impressive knowledge of celebrity gossip!
I love watching her interact with our nephews, niece, and friends’ children, and I know she will make an amazing mother. She looks forward to reading to our child, nurturing their curiosity as they learn about the world through play, and simply holding them to make them feel loved.
Randy is kind and caring. He cares deeply about other people, especially his family and his students. He is gentle and thoughtful, but can also be goofy and playful—he will be the kind of dad who is just as likely to have a meaningful conversations about life as he is to start a sudden water balloon fight. He has a strong personal moral code, and tries hard to do figure out the best thing to do in any given situation, and then do it. He has always been someone who looks for opportunities to volunteer in ways that allow him to make a positive impact on someone else’s life, whether it is mentoring a child or tutoring an adult English Language Learner. As a teacher, he is always thinking about ways to support his students who might feel like outsiders in some way, and I know that our child will always feel loved and supported with Randy as a dad.
In addition to his heart, Randy has a brilliant mind. He challenges my thinking and pushes me to examine my own values and ideas. He also works harder than anyone I know, balancing his teaching, writing career, and family time. He is driven and motivated, and is the rare kind of person who follows through on making his crazy ideas a reality.
We currently live in a cozy apartment on Stanford University’s campus. Our walls are covered with framed photos of family and places we’ve traveled, our shelves are filled with books, and our closet is crammed with board games. We have two rescue dogs named Loki and Arwen who love hiking and cuddling with us. One of our favorite places in our apartment is our comfortable couch where we love to snuggling with the pups as we relax and read or watch TV. We take turns cooking and cleaning, and when the weather’s nice, (and it usually is in the Bay Area!) we love to sit outside in the sunlight.
We have walking access to gyms, libraries, museums, art galleries, and a wide variety of university events for children. There are also many local parks and playgrounds, and just a short drive away are several great hiking trails, national parks, San Francisco, and the ocean. Our community of friends includes other students in Kathryn’s doctoral program, Randy’s coworkers and writer friends, and old friends who live in the area, all of whom are eager to meet and support our new child.
Although spread out across the world, family is extremely important to us, and family support will be a big part of our child’s life. Kathryn’s immediate family consists of her mother, sister, sister’s husband, and nephew (her father passed away when she was a teenager). Although her mother and sister are located on the east coast, we enjoy visiting them. We especially enjoyed visiting to celebrate our new nephew’s first Christmas (with matching holiday PJs)!
Our child will have many cousins to play with on Randy’s side, ranging in age from six months old to twenty one years old. His brother and his wife, who live in Colorado, have three boys. His sister and her husband live in Florida with their four sons and one daughter. Randy’s parents also live in Florida, and they always enjoy taking their grandchildren fishing or boating, or on trips to visit Disney World or Universal Studios.
Kathryn’s college roommate and her husband live nearby with their two small children, and they are like family to us. We enjoy getting together for meals, long walks, or food truck festivals. Randy plays endless games of pretend with their three-year-old, and Kathryn is a pro at reading picture books with him. We also have multiple friends who have adopted children or are currently in the process, as well as friends and family members who are adoptees themselves, and we are glad that our child will grow up around other adoptees.